Dear Gwendolyn

My sweet girl you are 4 years old!!!  I really can hardly believe it!  There are so many things that I want to share with you in the future and I look forward to them all the time but, on this special day, I want to take a moment to look back at the special times we've had this past year.

3 was a big year of changes and growth for you.  Although, you barely gained 3lbs, you gained some inches.  The size 2T pants you've been comfortably wearing for the past 2 years are actually now too short!  I feel like that happened overnight.  In December they were fine, after new years, I was seeing your ankles!  I've let you wear some of my favorite pairs a little too long ;o)  Your hair is getting pretty long again too.  You've been asking me for short hair since November but, I know your Daddy doesn't want that and I'm nervous about it too.  It's really silly, since even if it's not what you want in the end, it'll grow back of course.  My worry, is that you're so particular that if it's not what you are imagining and you are upset, it'll be a long time before you're happy with your hair again because it grows very slow.  The other big area of growth for you has been your vocabulary.  I adore listening to you talk!  You say some of the cutest things!  My favorites are when you are saying a statement very matter of fact and have these amazing expressions to go with it.  Usually, it's when you are repeating a rule to me to assure me you know it and plan to follow it.  You've also grown in your physical abilities.  In the last year you've really learned how to be amazingly independent.  From age 2-3 you wanted to do everything by yourself but still needed help usually.  Then from 3-4 you had the ability and generally wanted to do it by yourself but, sometimes, this does bother you because, you'd rather not be alone.  For instance, you can do all your jobs in the potty by yourself but, you really don't want to be in a different room from others so, you'll say "I have to go potty, do you want to watch me?"  I don't think it's because you're scared although sometimes you'll tell me that's why.  I think mostly you just don't want to be alone and I've got to tell ya girl, you come by that honestly!  Your Mama rarely likes to be alone.  Although, that's changed in recent years with having small children ;o)  Anyway, you can dress yourself, brush your hair and teeth (usually we will take a turn with brushing your teeth because you aren't entirely thorough yet) and will often go into the pantry to pick out your own snack.  It's a good thing you can't open the packages by yourself because you'd try to live entirely on "fruit gummies" if you could.

On the subject of food, you are still very picky.  We are wondering if you are a "super taster" like your Dad.  There seem to be many things you either smell and just barely touch your tongue to it and decide it's not a flavor you enjoy.  Sometimes, you're just being ridiculous but many times, you genuinely give it a try and I can tell the taste is very offensive to you.  I'm proud of how you are trying to stay open minded and will try things you don't think you'll like but are willing to try it again anyway.  Actually, I doubt this is so much about being open minded and more about knowing if you'll at least give it a good try, you have a better chance at getting a dessert!  You have a sweet tooth like your Mom for sure!  Almost all you want is chocolate when it comes to sweets.  Your favorite drink is chocolate milk, if you could have a chocolate donut with sprinkles everyday, you'd think you were the luckiest girl on the planet.  When given the choice you always choose chocolate.  Sweets or "treats" is a huge motivator for you.  Often times, you'll just ask straight out, "How many bites of this do I need to take so I can have a treat?"  I worry about you getting bad associations with food but, I'm afraid the damage is done and in your case, the apple really doesn't fall far from the chocolate covered tree!  Right now your favorite healthy meal is grilled chicken and rice (there really isn't a healthy vegetable you like).  Your favorite "bad for you meal" is chicken nuggets.

When it comes to play, you really enjoy dancing, singing and gymnastic type things like climbing up on everything and doing "flips" (which are really back rollovers) over the arms of the couch.  The more nonactive things you enjoy are coloring, writing your letters, counting and playing "princess dominos".  If it has a princess on it, you want it!  This has been the case for just over a year now and it doesn't look like you'll be changing your mind for a while.

One of the interesting things about you is how particular you are with everything!  Even things you try to pretend aren't particular to you (you'll say "I don't care Mom" if I ask you what you want to wear etc...) I can tell you really are hoping I'll choose whatever you're not verbally telling me.  Although you haven't been formally diagnosed, there's no doubt in our minds that you have OCD.  Our hope is that it never gets more severe than it already is and that maybe even we can help you deal with your compulsions and even better, maybe you'll grow out of the ones that seem to literally stop you dead in your tracks until you can complete whatever steps you have set in your mind that need completion before moving on.  You are proving to be quite head strong.  There are times when you can be very sassy and your Dad handles those situations much better than I do.  Most of the time the sassiness comes out in full force if you are feeling forced to do something you don't want to.  Usually it's what you have to hurry to get dressed for school or hurry to the potty.  Often times you'll tell me "I don't want to go potty and I'm never going to go again!"  Your sassy moments are certainly more than they were a year ago but, I know deep down inside that my sweet girl is still there.  At least once a day she emerges even for just a few moments.

We are taking you to Chuck E Cheese's for the first time for a small celebration and then the big family and friends party will be on Saturday.  You've requested cupcakes again as you did last year.  When you realized, you'd be having 2 separate celebrations you added that you wanted a regular cake for one of them ;o)  As far as a gift....when I asked you what you wanted just today, you said you wanted a "yellow pig".  After further discussion, I realized you wanted a real pig and not a stuffed animal!!  I hope you won't be too disappointed when you don't get one.

I can't wait to see what exciting adventures the next year brings us!  It'll be your last year at home (well aside from when you are at half day preschool).  This year you've been going to a 2 days a week program.  The plan is that you'll go 3 days a week starting in the fall.  Just one more step to help you adjust when you start kindergarten!!!  I know that's going to come way too fast for me!

I Love you the most,
Mommy <3 xoxo

Welcome to the world of boys!!

After having Link, I've had many times that's brought up the thought "welcome to the world of boys". He's been very different from Gwendolyn in many ways, most of them proving what all those btdt Mom's say true. He's a mama's boy and Gwendolyn is a daddy's girl. He's been a far more needy baby, setting himself up perfectly (I hope) to be an easy teenager. This has certainly been the opposite with Gwen so far. My big bummer is that Link has decided now is the time to become the typical "bam bam boy". I'm the last week he's taken a face plant on the concrete, fallen down the stairs and seems to enjoy hitting with or wihout a weapon in his hand. Link is really strong and can hit really hard! I'm hoping I can figure out effective punishment because, I don't want to be "that Mom, with the really rough kid" and people dred our coming to playdates etc.... If you know of a discipline that is effective please share. Keep in mind that I would classify myself (if I had to) as an "attachment parent" and We don't have corporal punishment in this house :-)

Dear Link

You are 18 months old now my sweet boy!  Even though the doctors are worried because you aren't talking, your Dad and I are not.  It's disconcerting of course when the pediatrician acts worried about you and of course whether intentional or not, making your parents feel like they are failing.  Let me tell you how much you are accomplishing.  You can figure out how almost anything works.  childproofing is a joke with you.  It doesn't even take you a long time to figure out how to manipulate items or the people around you.  If something is too high for you to reach, you have the intelligence to go to one of the rooms with a stool in it and carry it over to the other room where you desire to get higher.  If someone hands you an object and says "take this to (insert persons name here)" you know who it is, and you take it straight to them.  You are proficient in using utensils and can drink out of a normal cup.  Although you can get a bit messy with those ;o)  Following in your parents and your sisters footsteps, you are showing OCD tendencies already.  You usually will close doors if they are open when you pass them.  If you've opened the door, you always close it behind you.  If the puzzle pieces are out of their spots, you will attempt to place them where they belong.  We are still working on turning them until they fit in their spots properly but you know where they go for sure.  If given a crayon, you enjoy doing scribbling a bit but, then you prefer, collecting all the crayons, throwing them on the floor and picking them up again.  When I'm sweeping, it's imperative you have a broom of your own so you can sweep as well.  I'm very impressed by your balance.  I've been impressed with this for quite a while.  A perfect example and when I realized just how steady you can be is when you take a bath.  Getting you to actually sit down in the bath can be a chore and has been from the moment you could stand.  Most of the time you and Gwendolyn take your bath together.  Naturally, Gwendolyn is "swimming" and moving all over the place making some serious tidal waves in the tub.  You almost aways manage to stand through it all.  You can walk all around the tub and manage to stay on your feet.  Another area I'm thrilled you seem to be proficient at is the stairs.  Up and down you go without having any trouble.  Even with the dogs flying past you, you manage to always remember to turn around and go down backwards.  That said, you have fallen from the last step or 2 twice but, I say that isn't bad at all when you think about how often you are on them.  As far as playing goes, you would rather have a non-toy any day over some big expensive woop de woop toy that's all the rage.  Nope, all you want is whatever, is around you that you shouldn't be playing with.  At times, I can appease you with a wooden spoon but, usually it's a major disappointment since Daddy's telescope looks like a lot more fun.  At the park though, you LOVE the swing!  You'll stay on a swing for way longer than I will push you.  Bring on the music!!  You can't get enough of it!  Especially if someone is playing an instrument live for you.  When Duncan plays his viola or Daddy is playing his guitar, you are completely mesmerized by it.  Of course, you can't wait to try it out yourself.  You are enjoying food more and more.  Like your Daddy and your Sister, you have major texture issues although, you are very tolerant of many different flavors and spicy is not a problem at all.  It's a good thing too because almost everything I cook seems to be spicy ;o)  Aside from breastfeeding your favorite drink remains to be ice water but, you are liking milk a bit more all the time.  Your size at 18 months old is continuing to move closer to average.  Your weight is now 60th percentile and your height remains to be 50th percentile.  At 27lbs you are only 3lbs from matching your 4 year old Sister.  You'll be surpassing her I'm sure within the next year.

Yes, my sweet boy you are high maintenance but, I love every running hug, kiss and cuddle you give me.  Which, lucky for me are several a day.  Link, you are a lover and I love being the woman of your affections.

I love you the most!!!
Mommy :o)

"Show me the money"

Always into some kind of mischief

"Mommy, if I do this, can I have a treat?"

There isn't a day that goes by that Gwendolyn doesn't ask for a treat.  She usually asks before she's even had breakfast.  When she started getting "treats" (ie: any consumable that's not good for you) we were diligent about telling her that it was a treat.  We thought it would help her identify healthy items and realize that when she was a listener she would get a reward, often times being a treat.  Now, I'm regretting this approach.

My first problem is that I feel like I've already given her an unhealthy association with food.  It's not fuel for her body necessarily.  She definitely associates good behavior with getting a cookie or etc...  She basically expects that she will get a treat everyday.  Yes, we limit treats in that she doesn't get 5 cookies or a giant bowl of ice cream.  She'll get A cookie because she ate enough "good for you food" first.

My second issue is there is always a reason for a treat!  It may be that we're at a birthday party, it's a holiday, family or friends have come over for a visit, we have gone to someone else's house for a visit, we are traveling....etc....etc....etc  Also, since we unfortunately made it a reward for good behavior and for success with potty training, there isn't a day that goes by she hasn't earned a treat.

We've certainly expanded the definition of a "treat".  It's no longer just consumables.  It's getting the opportunity to watch a show or movie.  She may be able to get a little princess toy at the store checkout.  All of that is great except the damage is done and she wants that ice cream!  Not too mention, getting little toys aren't good for our pocket book or the clutter situation in our house.

My hope going further is to encourage a healthy relationship with food for not only Gwendolyn but for all of us.  Trying to find a good reward system that feels like a reward to the child but still something the adults can handle and be consistent with.

It snow's in central Texas

It's been snowing all day here.  We took the opportunity to have some family snow fun

Gwendolyn didn't want her picture taken but we did manage to snap a couple shots

Our Texas snowman :o)

Link was not really into it but, stayed long enough to show the size of our snowman ;-p

He enjoyed the jeep for about half a second 

A lucky shot of Gwendolyn, my camera shy girl

Indy had the most fun but even Lucy had a little fun

....and Link says we're done now.....

Looks like doing a mobile blog post with a picture isn't working for me. I'll figure it out someday but, I don't feel like doing the research now.

Here is my first mobile blog post. Hope it works....